Watch the subtitled video above if you prefer to listen to my advice.
Ghosting vs. Low Interest: Is She Ghosting You Or Is She Low Interest?
In today’s video, we’re gonna talk about women who ghost, or women who are low interest. It’s really important that you distinguish between the two because a woman who’s low interest, she’s losing a little bit of attraction. That’s normal. Sometimes a woman is just not fully convinced about you and I talked about this before: She’s like the wave. Sometimes she’s up. Sometimes she’s down. It’s the same thing with an ex, actually, sometimes she’s into you, sometimes she’s not into you, and if you play your cards right, if you’re secure, if you’re confident, then she’s basically going to be attracted to you long term, as long as you don’t make any mistakes.
However, if a woman is just ghosting you, then it’s not just like it’s a fluctuation, it’s not just like it’s a heat of the moment thing, it’s not just how she feels in the moment. If she ghosts you most of the time, she’s just not into you. And the reality is, if that is the case, you should just see that as a sign to move on and find a better woman. A woman who actually wants you. So let’s see what is my advice for a guy. He has been dating a girl and she has been ghosting him, basically, and he’s thinking that he can still make it work, or what if he can still make it work. But let’s see what do I think about the situation.
If She Ghosts You: How To Respond To Ghosting And What To Text A Girl When She Ghosts You
Hey coach, can you please help me with a girl who has started ghosting me? I have never been ghosted before, so I don’t know how to respond to it.
Well, typically, you shouldn’t respond to it at all. It is very tempting, for example, if you’ve been ghosted and feel aggressive, butthurt, disappointed, disrespected, and then you want to lash out… Never do anything like this. If a woman disrespects you, if a woman doesn’t care about you, if a woman doesn’t give a shit about you, then just don’t send her anything. Just ignore her. Show her that you don’t give a shit. If she doesn’t give a shit about you, then you don’t give a shit about her, so never respond to it. Just let it go. And whether you are disappointed, hurt, or not, it shouldn’t cause you any trauma. It shouldn’t cause you any disappointment. A little disappointment maybe, but you gotta move on from that. It definitely shouldn’t traumatize you.
A lot of codependent guys, when they get ghosted, they think that it’s about them. They think that there’s something wrong with them. But if a woman ghosts you, whatever! It’s her problem. It’s her loss. You are a king. You are amazing. And if she doesn’t see that, well, then she’s just stupid. There’s no other way to put it. She’s blind. She can’t see what an awesome dude you are. And most likely, she’s gonna keep on dating shitty guys. So look, dude, you know, if a woman ghosts you, that’s not necessarily your fault. You keep doing your thing. Keep moving forward. Don’t let yourself be disrespected by a woman.
Suddenly Ghosted By A Girl: When You’ve Been Texting For A Month & You Had Great Chemistry
Her ghosting came kind of out of left field. I really did not expect her to just start ignoring my messages and I don’t know how to follow up on this. For context, this isn’t just some girl that I knew for like a week or some girl that was basically some early Tinder match where we just start to get to know each other. We’ve been talking for almost three weeks, gradually getting to know each other better. We have been getting along quite well. In fact, better than I get along with most girls on dating apps. Usually, there’s no spark and we stop talking after just a day or right after the first messages, but with her it, was continuous chatting and getting to know each other.
So let me just say something here. I think you’re making this too much about your experience. Your experience so far with dating, you’re saying, that you’re getting along quite well, you’re chatting a lot with a lot of girls. You typically just don’t chat. You just message them once on a dating app on Tinder and it goes nowhere. That doesn’t mean though that this should be your normal. This shouldn’t be your “new normal“. You shouldn’t just see this one woman, especially because she’s talking to you, and the other women, they are… You know, that’s your normal. The other woman who don’t talk to you are your normal and she’s special because she talks to you.
No of course, you should just try to increase that ratio of the women who talk to you. And you should think about how can you have better openers that are more entertaining. How can you say things that are more entertaining. Now, with that said, I also want to mention that by the way, three weeks of talking is not yet that long. Yes, it’s still ghosting, of course, but obviously, she’s not very heavily invested in you after three weeks. And if you, for example, haven’t had a date yet, if you haven’t actually met up, then there’s no reason for her not to ghost you. She’s not really attached to you. She doesn’t really have to do any commitment. And so if she’s not into it, then she will ghost. Now, am I defending it? No, of course not. If she’s just not into you, then let her go. If she’s ghosting, then let her ghost. You just move on & date other women. So the problem is, of course, that as I said, you don’t have a high enough ratio.
So you’re probably giving too much attention to that one woman, whereas you should be giving more attention to at least three, four women on a dating app. Especially, if you’re just chatting, you haven’t met any of them yet then, you should talk to at least a few girls, because as you can see, you never know. Maybe she just gets bored and then she ghosts you. So look, this might not even be about you. It might be that she’s more excited by some other guy or she’s already been dating some other guy. Or maybe some guy right next to where she lives who she can date very easily. There are all kinds of reasons why she might be ghosting you. It’s not necessarily about you. And that’s how you should really treat it when you date. It’s not about you. You shouldn’t take it personally. And that’s also why you should be dating multiple girls. I think you are too invested in this girl after just three weeks.
Before She Ghosts: She Canceled Our Date And Now She Has Gone Cold On Me
I asked her if she would want to go to the movies with me to see Dr. Strange and she said yes. I asked her on Monday to make sure there’s enough time for her to decide. So I don’t think I did anything wrong here. I also didn’t change much about my texting approach. I swear to God, I did not chase more than usual. We still had the occasional back-and-forth messages during the week. Sharing funny memes, sharing what we’re up to during the day, etc… Nothing special or over the top. But on Thursday, she already messaged me that she can’t make it because of her mom. She said that she had to help her out on the weekend at the shop. Maybe it was an excuse but it could be true because her mom owns a salon and she helps out every now and then. So I didn’t try to overthink it but after that weekend, she’s been going cold on me, and eventually, she didn’t even reply to my messages any longer.
Well, so first of all, this is obviously a flake or this is ghosting. Well, it’s a flake at this point, but we’re gonna see in a moment she’s actually starting to ghost. You could have actually done something here. You could have actually inquired if she wants to meet up with you after she has to help out in the salon. I’m guessing she wouldn’t have to help out the entire day. So if it would just be an excuse, obviously, she would then say “Sorry, I can’t because I’m gonna be so tired,” or something like that. Yesterday, I got a message from a guy that I met at a coffee shop recently and he wanted to hang out, and I just didn’t want to hang out and I was like “Nah, not today.” I just was tired and I also just didn’t want to hang out in general, and I just told him “Dude, sorry, I can’t. I’m gonna work today“, which was actually true, but I also just didn’t want to hang out. And I told him “Dude, see you tomorrow at the coffee shop. I’m gonna be there tomorrow. Let’s hang out tomorrow.” Sometimes girls just make up these shitty excuses. That’s just normal when they are not feeling it.
But if she, like I did actually, I don’t mind hanging out with this guy in general. He seems nice. He seems cool. And there are a lot of guys at that coffee shop that I now know. A lot of people are becoming my friends at this regular coffee shop that I go to, and I actually suggested “Okay, why don’t we go tomorrow?” or “I’ll see you tomorrow. I’ll be there tomorrow. So let’s hang out tomorrow.” … So I suggested an alternative. She’s not suggesting an alternative. You could have actually asked her if she wants to hang out after the salon, after she’s done with the work, and see if she’s okay with it. And if she would really like you, then she would actually say “Yes, I can make time. Let’s meet up for dinner after that,” and obviously, if she doesn’t give a shit and if it is just an excuse, then she will just find yet another excuse. So I would have gauged here a little bit more if it’s really an excuse, but it probably was, but I guess hey overall, you couldn’t really do much here anyway. So whether you asked or checked out if she maybe was just bullshit you, or not ultimately she’s flaking on you, you can’t do much, anyway.
Will She Come Back After Ghosting Me: Who Cares, Bro. If She Ghosts You Ghost Her Back!
As I said, I really don’t think I changed anything in my approach at all. I didn’t become insecure at all. I was just happy to see her, but for some reason, it seems that I turned her off. Ghosting seriously sucks. I don’t know why anyone would ever do something like this, but I guess there could be so many reasons why she might have been turned off. So the question is what do you think I should do if a girl is turned off and you can’t tell what the reason is for it?
Should you just wait it out, pull back, and increase her attraction for you? And also, just in general, how do I respond if she comes back? I mean, do I call her out on it? I think this might be weird and make her become defensive. But I don’t think I should just shrug it under the rug either. So how do you see it? She’s cute and as I said, maybe she really had something going on with the salon and who knows why she ghosted. So I hope that I can start with her from the beginning if she wants to. So if she does, I need a battle plan. Thanks for your help. Your channel helps me a lot with my understanding of women and really relaxes me. It’s like my daily habit to watch your channel now.
Thanks for watching my channel so much. And I’m glad that it helps you. Well, so one thing that you say here when you end your message is you say that you need a battle plan. If you need a battle plan with a woman, then you should just run away. And that’s what I said with ghosting versus low attraction. Is she ghosting you? Or is she low attraction? Did you just turn her off? Maybe you turned her off but the bottom line is if you feel like you have to fight it, if you feel like you have to come up with a strategy, a grand plan, like Sun Tzu, basically, you have to figure out how do you defeat your enemy…! I mean, obviously, that’s a big problem. Why should the woman that you’re dating or that you’re into be your enemy? That makes no sense! So if you have to come up with a battle plan, then just walk away. Is she maybe gonna come back? Should you call her out? Well, don’t do anything.
As I said, if a woman ghosts, you if a woman loses attraction, and she’s just not into you for whatever reason, that’s one thing. That can happen. You don’t do anything. The thing is though also she didn’t really suggest any alternative. She’s not messaging you anymore. She’s not replying. That’s pretty lame. Now what I do is when I talk to a woman and I’m not into her even though she likes me, I will just say sorry, I’m not into you. Or I will say I’m busy, or something like that. Even if maybe I don’t 100% say the reason why I don’t want to hang out because maybe I’m just not into her and there’s something about her that I don’t like, and obviously, I don’t want to hurt her feelings. I will let her know in some way “Sorry, I can’t hang out with you,” or “Sorry, I can’t make time right now,” that’s the least that you can give a woman.
What If She Came Back After Ghosting You: Only Re-Attract Girls Who Ghosted You Due To Your Weakness
Don’t ghost. I think ghosting really sucks. You saw it yourself. It just fucking sucks. It’s awful. And so you should never do this. And if a woman is willing to do this to you when she’s probably not worth your attention because you want to be with a woman who has integrity, who at the very least will say look, she’s decent enough to say “Sorry, I don’t want to see each other anymore,” or “I started seeing someone else,” or “I’m too busy,” at least there’s a clarity that she’s just not up for it. It’s just about human decency and you can then read between the lines and know that yeah okay, she’s just not into me. All right, no problem. No hard feelings. Thanks for being so decent, to actually let me know how you feel to some extent. That’s what I do because I feel like I’m a king. I want to be a king and I want to be with a queen. So I show up exactly how I want to be treated and you should also basically be treated the way that you want to show up. So I suggest that this is how you show up always. Be honest with women. But it seems that she is not honest with you.
So you should ask yourself twice do you actually want her to come back? Because you might as well just rather focus all your energy and your time on something more worthwhile. That gives you more let’s say, return of investment. Clearly, you’re not getting anything out of the situation. I would rather focus on all of these girls where you don’t have good conversations. Why? Because once you teach yourself how to have better conversations, once you learn how to open a conversation that actually keeps it going, once you get that, you’ll have a lot of return of investment. You can then either make it work with one of those girls, or just into the future, if you look into the future 10 years from now, if you work on that right now and you figure it out in the next year, guess what? You’re going to have a really great time in the next nine years moving forward. Whereas for example, spending another three months waiting for this girl or trying to make it work, battling it out, having a battle plan, that’s just way too exhausting.
I think you should just move on from this. If she comes back, sure, invite her out. But if she does this one more time or if she does some kind of ghosting again, like not responding, then I would actually call her out. I would say “Hey, this is like the second time that you’re not responding to me and I think this is very disrespectful behavior. I don’t like this and sorry, I don’t think I want to talk to you anymore. I don’t want to date you anymore. I don’t want to get to know you anymore. And thanks so much for your time so far, but it was nice knowing you.” Sometimes you just gotta hold women accountable and tell them “You’re kind of full of shit and you’re a dick, and you can maybe do this with other guys but, not with me.” … If she does it twice, either you walk away, or you let her know in friendly terms that what she’s doing is pretty rude. Now, that’s all that you can do right now. But as I said, I don’t think that she’s a woman who’s worth chasing. I think you are just giving too much attention to this woman because you haven’t figured out yet how to attract more women. So I think you should focus on attracting more women. That’s my advice for you. Let me know in the comments what you think. Give me a thumbs up, subscribe to the channel, and never forget to unleash the king within.
