Watch the subtitled video above if you prefer to listen to my advice.
Have you ever had a woman who’s just batshit crazy and she’s just jealous or insecure, has certain issues always causing drama, whatever it is? You know, typically when a woman is insecure, she does a lot of things that pile on and it’s not just jealousy and accusing you of cheating. Maybe she’s always causing fights, or she’s thinking you’re not paying enough attention to her. Whatever it is, there could be all kinds of flaws with a woman like this. If you can’t change her, if she can’t change herself, you can’t do anything about this.
When Your Girlfriend Has Trust Issues: You Can’t Fix Her When She Doesn’t Trust You & When She’s Toxic
Ultimately, of course, nobody’s perfect. I’m not perfect, you’re not perfect, she’s not perfect. No woman is perfect, no person on the planet is perfect. So, for example, if you have anger issues, or you’re an alcoholic, or a workaholic, or whatever issues you might have, your woman should really be the person to go to and to work on these things, right? It’s about growth and about learning how to live your life. If you build a life together with a woman, you should work together to figure out the things and the needs that you have that you’re not so good at, and figuring out how can you become more secure, live your life better.
So, for example, if you would be an alcoholic, your woman should be the go-to person to talk about these issues, like “hey babe, I work too much, but I don’t know what to do, and I need your support with this,” right? And you’re willing to accept that you have some flaws, and you’re gonna work on them. Or maybe your wife or your girlfriend is gonna tell you “hey, you work way too much, and we really need to find a better compromise.” And then, if you’re willing to change, you’re gonna figure out how to change, right? But if you can’t change, it’s pointless. And if your girlfriend can’t change, if she’s just batshit crazy, and she accuses you, in this case of this guy’s message, accuses you of cheating all the time, well, sorry to say it, but there are better women out there who are actually able to address their traumas. Because you can’t change her, that’s her job. You can only support her in that process.
So let’s get into the message and let’s see what is my advice. But I think you can already tell what is my advice. But too long, didn’t read: if a woman is batshit crazy and accuses you of cheating or something other stuff that you clearly haven’t done, and she does it repeatedly, and even though you’re trying to reassure her it doesn’t change, well, I don’t have a trash can right next to me where I could hold it up, but you get the metaphorical idea. In the trash, basically.
Relationship Deterioration Stages: Relationships Require Attention And Work Over The Years
Hey coach, my girlfriend Katie and I have been together for almost one and 1/2 years now. In the beginning, our relationship was very strong. It was so passionate and we spent countless hours having sex. Everything was so great at first, but in the last few months, things are not so strong anymore.
Well, that’s kind of typical, even if a woman has a lot of issues, I think you ignored them because you said yourself the sex was so great, right? It happens.
I’ve been guilty of this myself in the past. That is, I’ve been thinking too much with my dick and I’ve been dating women where it was just crazy. I shouldn’t have been dating them, but I just wanted the pussy. You gotta learn to not just go for the pussy. Also, you have to learn that the first few months or the first 6 months, maybe even up to the first year or so, will be way too good, and you won’t be able to see all of the flaws, or you will ignore them a little bit too much. So, you have to be really a bit rational about these flaws, and not close your eyes, not be blind to all of his red flags. But hey, the damage has been done. So, this has been a lesson learned for you. Let’s see what he says next.
Girlfriend Thinks I’m Cheating: When Your Girlfriend Accuses You Of Cheating — What To Say To Her
My girlfriend has been accusing me of cheating, for example, when I go out to hang out at a friend’s place and don’t text her as much. She’ll think I’m cheating. I don’t know how someone could think that you’re cheating when you meet up with some of your best bros, you know, guys with actual dicks.
Yeah, um, I don’t know, maybe she’s scared that she’s going to go over to the other camp. No man, I know it doesn’t make sense. Obviously, it’s insecurity. It’s just pure irrational insecurity because you’re thinking how, I mean, how could you be jealous of my best friends or my bros? Just how? I’m not gay, right? So, what is up with this? It’s just insecurity. She’s not able to think clearly. She’s just basically replaying the same problems over and over. “You’re a cheater, you’re a cheater, you’re going to leave me, you’re going to abandon me.“
Maybe some abandonment issues, or maybe it’s a projection that she might be thinking about doing something like this, or she has been doing something like this. Maybe she’s done something that she’s not proud of, maybe not necessarily physical cheating, but maybe she’s been talking to another guy and she might be rejecting as well. I’m not saying that this is how it happened, but this could be a case of something like this happening. But, I think it’s probably more just general crazy insecurity, and this is probably never going to change because if a woman has such deeply rooted insecurities, it’s probably showing you that she doesn’t want to address them because she’s afraid to address them.
But, if you’ve ever been in a really bad breakup as a guy, you probably know that problem of not addressing deeply rooted trauma issues, and you messed up so bad, and then the woman disappeared, she left you because she was so done with you, and she’s maybe done forever, you never know. And at that point, you probably decided, “I’m going to change, I’m going to address my shitty behaviors,” and you probably then addressed these behaviors relatively quickly. And if she can reach that point, or if she hasn’t reached that point yet, maybe it’s time to move on and find another woman who is just healthier because I think it’s probably just very exhausting to try to prove to her that you’re not interested in the dicks of your best bros. It just sounds tiring, so do you really want that? I don’t think you do.
She Is Too Jealous: How Jealous Is Too Jealous In A Relationship With A Woman? Enough Is Enough?!
Also, when I’m just home and I take a shower or I decide to put some clothes in the washing machine and I don’t answer for maybe 20 to 25 minutes, she starts calling or accuse me of cheating. She’s always been a bit dramatic, but lately, this is coming out of nowhere.
Hmm, well, I don’t think it’s coming out of nowhere. You say it yourself, she’s always been a little bit dramatic. And it’s really crazy if you think about it. You can’t be left alone for 25 minutes, maybe less, and she’s going to message you and she’s going to say that you’re cheating with some other chick, basically. Right? That’s nuts. You basically have no life. Do you want to live a life like this? And you said it yourself, she’s always been dramatic. So that tells me that this hasn’t been coming out of nowhere at all. It’s just that you probably thought that this can’t get so bad initially and you struck it under a rock.
Like I said, you probably thought a little bit too much with your dick, but then eventually, it just got way out of hand. Essentially, as long as the infatuation period is there, as long as the hormones are doing their job, she’s relatively fine. She’s a little bit dramatic, but you know, it’s not that bad. But as soon as these hormones slowly fade off, she essentially starts revealing her true colors. And her true colors are just… are their ugly colors. Well, they’re just dark. They’re brown. They’re muddy. They’re just not clean. And you want to be with a woman who’s clean, who feels as clean as the clothes that you’ve put in the washing machine, basically. You know, you want to be with a woman who just stains your entire body, your entire character, your entire mood.
No, you want to be with a woman who makes you feel really great. Like if you smell… like imagine you smell some freshly washed clothes. It smells so good. This is how your positive attitude should be like because you’re with woman. But that’s not what it is like right now. So I don’t think this is ever gonna get better because it’s just one and 1/2 years so far and there’s some pretty extreme issues here. Anyway, let’s see what he says. So let’s see, maybe something is possible to resolve, but hey, let’s see.
One time I sent her a pic of my legs in my joggers, and it looked like I was hard. She replied, ‘I see you are hard,’ and I jokingly replied, ‘Yep, just done with leg workout, but I still need some special workout with you.’ And then she replied, saying, ‘I guess your heart because more girls are using it.’ I said, shocked, ‘What the…? No, of course not.’…
So, ugh, dude, this is so exhausting. Imagine you’re trying to flirt with her, you’re trying to essentially tell her, “Come over, I wanna fuck you,” and any normal woman who is really into you and she just loves to have sex with you should come over, and that’s it, man, you’re gonna have some crazy time and that’s about it. But instead of that, she’s like, “Wait, is someone else stroking your dick?” Dude, she’s just always looking, it’s like she’s looking for a fight, dude. It’s literally looking for a fight.
This has been the most pleasant thing you could have done. Essentially, you know I want to have sex with you. You know, babe, I really miss you, and why don’t you come over and help me out a little bit? But instead of being happy about this, she’s looking for a fight. I hate women like this, and I’m sure you hate it as well. You’re just telling yourself you’re bullshitting yourself that just has any hope but doesn’t have any hope. I don’t think so, and it just sounds pretty toxic. So again, I think you should leave this woman.
My Girlfriend Stalks My Instagram: She Accuses Me Of Flirting With Other Women Who Are Only Friends
I don’t even have that many female friends on my IG, and of course, they’re all platonic long-term friends or friends of friends. Yet she accused me of sending them thirst trap pictures of my muscles, workout flex pics, basically. I’ve never done that, that’s crazy. She claimed that I liked sending them pictures and they probably sent me flirty pictures that she shouldn’t be sending. She asked to see my phone, but I refused, not because I had anything to hide but because I was really frustrated and disappointed with her behavior.
That was the right approach. Look, if you would have really done something wrong, you know, sometimes there is merit in showing your girlfriend your phone. You know, some trust sometimes is broken and sometimes you maybe have to open up and say, “Look, okay, here’s my phone, you can check it, there’s nothing wrong here,” and problem solved most likely. But in this case, it’s just so toxic, and you’ve done nothing wrong basically. There’s no warrant for why she should actually check out your phone. The only reason why she wants to check out your phone is that she has a trust issue, but she doesn’t have a trust issue with you; she has a trust issue with herself. She doesn’t trust herself to put her trust in you. It has nothing to do with you, it’s all about her, and it’s all about her insecurities that she’s not addressing.
You said it very clearly, you think it’s crazy what she’s saying that you’ve done or that you’re doing, so that tells me there’s no way in hell that you would be doing something like this, and you’re thinking this is Gaga, so you know why are you still with her? That should really give you some food for thought if it really makes sense being with her. I know the sex has been great, and you’ve been together for so long, but if it can’t be fixed, it can’t be fixed.
She Doesn’t Trust Me: My Girlfriend Has Trust Issues — How Can I Help Her Get Over Her Jealousy?
All this started roughly after one year of us being together, and I tried proving to her anything I can to reassure her. I didn’t want to delete my friends on IG, yeah, that’s just a no goal. All of our accusations started worrying me more and more, and over time, I became more distant before because this reached a point where it happened almost every other day. There was always something that I had done, constant accusations. The hard part about this is that she broke up with me 2 weeks ago stating that she had evidence that I cheated and also that I had not proposed to her yet and didn’t want to commit to her.
Right, I forgot that she broke up with you, sorry about that, but yeah, that’s just nuts. Imagine you’ve gone through all of this trouble, all of this pain of trying to even reassure her despite the fact that she’s batshit crazy. You didn’t just leave. You actually tried to make it work, but then, despite everything, she breaks up with you? What the f*ck? This should be your sign to walk away forever, because, well, what did she say? You know she has evidence that you cheated on her. Like, you know what? Don’t even react to that. Don’t even respond to that. Tell her, “You know whatever you want to believe, you can believe that. That’s fine. I’m not here to change her mind anymore. I really tried to make this work.“
And I guarantee you, she’s gonna freak out because she just wants to get a reaction out of you. Her insecurity is all about getting some validation, right? This is why insecure women do this. When they accuse you of cheating or something else that you clearly haven’t done, they just wanna know that they’re loved. And they feel that without you showing your love, they are worthless, basically. That’s how they feel, roughly speaking. But this is never gonna change. If she does feel some love from coming from within herself, she will always look for that validation, and she will accuse you of crazy shit. And so you gotta walk away from this. It’s not gonna change. And let’s not even talk about the fact that she broke up with you because you haven’t proposed to her yet. Whatever, man. Just this might be something that could be fixed and to talk about in a healthy, relatively healthy relationship, but this is just not a healthy relationship even to begin with. So, I would not even talk about the fact that you haven’t proposed yet. Who would propose to a woman who always causes drama? I would not. Well, correction. I would not do that right now.
But back in the past, I would have done that, and I was actually ready to do that with a very toxic woman. So you know, you should ask yourself why would you even wanna propose to her if she’s so crazy and always causing so many problems? You’re basically always fighting and always on your toes. In narcisism term, I don’t think she’s a narcissist, but in narcisism term, they often talk about walking on eggshells. Right, you don’t even know where am I gonna step because there’s always gonna be something that’s gonna happen. She’s always going to look for some problem, some drama to cause just to get some validation from you. So that feels really exhausting. It really sucks, and why would you propose to a woman like this? I would just leave very, very quickly. So anyway, she broke up with you, but, you know, it’s kind of the best time now to leave and let it go. But let’s see how you wrap the message up.
Crazy Jealous Girlfriend: My Insecure Girlfriend Is Possessive And Controlling — Her True Colors
That wasn’t true at all. I had not proposed because of the shit in the last years, and I even told her this was the reason. I always made efforts to avoid any of those situations that would be considered cheating, especially because I started to be really stressed about how she’d react to anything I would do.
Yep, that is walking on eggshells.
So, she doesn’t believe me and states that I have cheated when I have not. She won’t say how but just says that she knows, and I have no idea even how I supposedly cheated, and she would not provide me evidence on what I did, so I can’t even refute it. So, she doesn’t even have anything to back it up.
That’s perfect. So, her imagination is just going insane, and she’s probably seeing all the signs. I mean, she was already jealous of your bro’s, basically your bro’s dick. So, I’m assuming as soon as you talk to any chick, she’s gonna go batshit crazy and she’s making up stories in her mind that are not true. What can you do about that? You can’t do anything about that. So, it doesn’t matter if she has evidence or not. Bottom line is, she makes you really unhappy, man. So, it’s a good thing that she broke up with you.
Now I’m the bad guy from something I did not do. She won’t let me prove otherwise. I don’t know what she told our mutual friends either. I don’t know how to feel about this. I feel stupid even though she’s acting all irrationally. I feel bad about the breakup and miss her, despite the fact that all of this is not my fault. And as I said, I swear to God I have never done anything that could even remotely be considered cheating. I believe you. I never even flirted with any girls. I don’t know why I still want her back even after all of this. What are your thoughts on this?
Well, I think I already made it clear that you should just leave this woman and let it go. Say, “This is it, she broke up with you. I’m done with this shit!” Why do you still want her? Why do you feel stupid because you still want her back and you miss her, basically, right?
Well, there are 2 reasons. Number one is something that’s related to something again from narcissism. It’s called the trauma bond. When we get traumatized by another person, we ironically attach more to that person because the good moments, like for example the great sex that you had, is so amazing, it feels so close. So when you have negative moments, a lot of negative moments, the good ones feel even better. So that’s number one, and it sounds like the sex was really great.
Number 2 is you just recently broke up, so clearly you’ve been together for one and 1/2 years. It’s normal, natural to miss a woman, even if a woman was really, really bad. Sometimes you just can’t help yourself. It’s your emotions, it’s your heart. You’ve been together with this person for a long time. You’ve probably woken up to this woman every single day for at least something like 6 months, maybe even longer. So it’s kind of understandable that you still miss her and that you still have feelings for her, but these feelings will eventually disappear, or rather, well, what will happen for sure is that you’re going to get some distance and realize, “holy shit, this woman was crazy.“
I don’t know how old you are, you didn’t really mention this, but maybe you’ve sometimes looked back on your life and you looked back at like 5 years ago or 10 years ago or 15 years ago, like “who the was I back then, how could I ever be a person like this, this was crazy, how could I ever go on with something like this in my life,” you know it’s kind of nuts. So for example, when I moved to the Philippines, all of it was not planned at all. It was very random and very impulsive, and now if I look back at that, I’m like, “how the did I ever make this happen? How did I not end up being homeless?” something like that, right? So, you need some distance and some time from it, and eventually, you’re gonna be like, “wow, how did I ever even love this woman? I just clearly thought too much with my dick.“
So, I think what that tells me is what you need to do is you need to give it some distance, some space. You need to give it some time, and what you need to do is not respond to any accusations. If she tells your friends something about you did this and this and that, a lot of them probably know how crazy she is already, so are they gonna believe her? Well, whatever if they do, what kind of friends are they? Just wait and give it some time. Eventually, you’re gonna realize this is kind of crazy, and I don’t want this anymore.
Maybe you’re gonna find another woman. Typically, I would not suggest to just date another woman right away after a breakup, especially if the woman meant a lot to you, but in this case, I just don’t think that she’s a high quality woman. I have a feeling if you would be going on any dating app right now, even if the breakup just recently happened, very quickly, you’re going to find a much better, much healthier woman, and you will never ever think about her.
And then she’s probably still gonna message you and say you’ve been cheating or you know, oh, you’re dating this new girl. I knew she’s the one that you’ve been cheating on with me, and you’ll be like, “Yeah, whatever. Think what you want. Nice seeing you. It was nice hearing from you. Bye-bye and see you never.” You know, something like that. You know what’s that song from Nikki? Great song. “See you never,” right? So, you know where she sings, “I’ll be seeing you never. You know, light as a feather.” And you’ll feel so good after that. And that’s what I want for you.
You’re a king. Find yourself a better woman. Whether you want to date already or not doesn’t matter, but you know, I think you could already date another woman, just casually get to know another woman, get to know multiple women, just go on dates, and maybe your friends can introduce you to some decent chicks if they know some decent chicks, who knows? But you know, I don’t think that this woman is the right one for you. She’s ratchet, crazy, all of the stuff about the cheating. I think you’re a decent guy, and you felt so bad about yourself even though you haven’t even done anything. So, I don’t want that for you, and it’s not fair. It’s not fair treatment towards you. She just doesn’t respect you at all. She doesn’t think about how you feel about all of these accusations, and that is just bullshit. So, find yourself a queen, find a healthy woman, and that is my advice for you. Let me know in the comments what you think. Give me a thumbs up, subscribe to the channel, and never forget to unleash the king within.
